Valentines Day Spanking Importance

OK, here is the thing. My boyfriend has insisted on holiday spankings. This means christmas, new year, fourth july (i think maybe you guys call it rebellion day or something), thanksgiving, easter, etc etc, and valentines day.

Do I complain? of course not! Far as I'm concerned, the days of NO spanking should be the exception.
However, Mike insists that valentines day really IS a holiday with a spanking tradition.

Now, he knows he does not need to convince me, that I will readilly go with any day he decides is a spanking day, so that made me wonder just what kinda tradition really calls for spanking.

Wellll, it turns out he is right!

According to a guy named Lenski speaking to National Geographic (so we gotta assume its accurate)

"In ancient, Pre-Christian era Rome, 13, 14 and 15 February were celebrated as Lupercalia, a pagan fertility festival. This seems to be the basis for a celebration of love on this date. It was marked in a subtly different way in those days, however. According to Noel Lenski, classics professor at the University of Colorado at Boulder, speaking in the National Geographic, young men would strip naked and use goat- or dog-skin whips to spank the backsides of young naked women in order to improve their fertility; an early IVF, if you will."

Ok, so...

You have a bunch of men and women stripping off, men getting a bunch of leather floggers (well, thats what i think they mean by an animal skin thong) and they go around spanking the women. And this is all to promote fertility.

I am thinking, well duhhh, how could it NOT?

Let's take a look at what I mean.

For simplicity sake, let's assume the total number of young females taking part in this ritual is one million. OK, is it not reasonable to assume that with any group of women willing to strip off and get spanked that at least 80 percent might be like the girls reading this that actually like getting spanked and might find such a group spankathon ritual exciting enough to get very aroused by all the guys wanting to go around spanking them?

Ok now this next bit takes a bit of math and logic. During any given month, a woman can conceive about 5 days in a row. Now with that there are 30 (on average) groups of consecutive 5 day periods a woman of child rearing age will be likely to conceive. Of those intervals, 15 will include the 3 day valentines ritual.

Ok next logical assumption, of the 1 million young female adults 800,000 of which will get very aroused from this ritual then 400,000 of which will be at a time of pregnancy capability (15/30 and rounding WAY down just to make it even more conservative estimate) Now let's round WAY down for sake of best guess since not everyone will get pregnant, not every one is able to conceive and not every guy is potent., So lets say 250,000

Out of a million women stripping off and getting chased and spanked by men weilding leather floggers of which 800,000 (and i think i may be low balling) will be getting very excited enjoying it, all these men chasing them and spanking them and come on, you know its gonna end up in some damn good holiday fucking,

mathmatically back in a time when there was basically little contraception, you gonna have 250,000 ending up pregnant.

It's no wonder it was called a fertility ritual with that rate of pregnancy! And what was the catalyst? SPANKING

So, there you go.. Want to start a family? Spank your woman daily but especially on valentines day just to be sure.

Ok, that simplified things ridiculously, but hey, so what? Anyone want to tell me it's bad advice?? I thought not! and besides, she aint gonna complain! are you, girls? And hell, even if you don't want to get pregnant, spank her anyways on valentines day just for historical tradition sake.